Since I was in high school I began praying for God to use my life in a mighty way for His glory. I wanted to draw as many people to the throne of God as I could and share with them how my relationship with Jesus was like no other. I found myself, however, praying, "Use me Lord, but I can't do this or that because it might interfere with MY plans." When I was in college, I wanted to be married more than anything so I refused to try out for certain music touring groups or anything that might get in the way of me getting married. God finally, in His loving, gentle way, said to me, "You keep telling me to use you, but you have so many conditions on this, that I'm not ever finding you available to do the things I have for you." I was so convicted. There's no telling how many wonderful things God had in store for me that I missed out on because I was so stuck to my feeble minded plans. At that moment I began praying, "God, I want You to use me in a mighty way! No conditions! Whatever Your plan and will is for me, that's what I want and I pray that many will come to know You through it and that You will be glorified.
So I did audition for the Universities travel band called, Vision, and was able to tour with them for a year singing and sharing God's love all over the place. This pageant was another thing that I did and in winning the title, I again had the opportunity to travel all over, singing and sharing my testimony of how the God of the universe unconditionally loved me so much...no matter what my past looked like, and no matter what mistakes He knew I would make in the future, His love was deeper and wider and more fulfilling than anything they could imagine.
I did not use my winnings to make a CD, but I did get engaged during my reign as Miss University of Mobile and was able to use that money towards a wedding instead. God's timing was perfect and I grew so much in that year as I learned to trust God with my life- every detail of it! He stretched me to do things I never thought I would do. He equipped me to do what He called me to do and I am thankful that God provided many opportunities for me to share about His love and faithfulness.
Here I am again at a new chapter in my life. For the last 17 years I have been totally devoted to the six wonderful gifts that God entrusted to me to call my children. I have changed more diapers than I care to mention, done more laundry than you can imagine, made more school lunches, cleaned up so many messes, driven to so many practices, attended so many games, and those who are mothers know that the list goes on and on. I am still doing a lot of those things, but my kids are not as needy and dependent on their mama as they used to be. They are all growing into amazing young men and little women and my heart couldn't be more full. Their independence now begins a new chapter for me as their mama. Sammy started school this year and for the first time in 17 years, ALL of my kids are in school. Over the last year I have been seeking God's direction for me in this new phase. What He wants for me to do to honor Him with my time and also what I can do to help our family financially. However, I have found myself still praying to be used in a mighty way for His glory but again with many conditions. So, many years later, God has gently reminded me to, "Trust in Him with ALL my heart and to lean not on my own understanding. In all my ways acknowledge Him and He will make my paths straight." Prov.3:5
God also promises in Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans that I have for you declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to hurt you. Plans to give you hope and a good future." So I cling to this and look with expectancy and excitement of what God has in store. I seek for Him to use me with no conditions and I encourage you to do the same! I encourage you to surrender to Him every area of your life in 2019. Look with expectancy of all that He will do in and through your life! Seek to be used in mighty ways and never doubt what the Savior can do with your life!!! Be bold in your asking and strong in your believing! Happy New Year!