A story I must tell...If you've read any of my blogs you know that Derrick and I dealt with infertility for 8 very long years. Those were truly some of the most trying years of my life. Every month thinking, "This could be the month!" only to be diappointed by another negative sign. Well, that's when I started writing my book. I wanted other women dealing with infertility to know that they were not alone. I wanted to share all the ups and downs and how my Savior had gotten me through each low moment.
Let me share with you about a day I will never forget.
It was a Saturday afternoon and I had been cleaning house all day. I don't believe I had even brushed my teeth (Gross, I know!) No make-up, gymshorts and tee shirt...just giving you the full picture. The boys (If this is the first blog of mine that you've read, our first two boys were adopted from birth.) were playing and Derrick was at church leading worship in the two services that our church had every Saturday night. I decided to sit down and write a little in my book. I was on the chapter in my book that discusses different women in the Bible that suffered from infertility and how each of them dealt with it. I began to write a personal point about how through all the devastation, I was now beginning to see the bigger picture. God wanted us to be blessed with two amazingly, precious little boys that I could not imagine my life without. God was revealing to me to live each day in expectancy and excitement to see what He is up to. As I wrote those words down, God told me to go to the bathroom garbage can and look at the pregnancy test that I had taken the day before. Taking a test was a monthly ritual for me. I immediately threw it away because I had heard that the "positive" sign comes up immediately and I didn't see it right away so I chuncked it. Just like the thousands of others that I had taken over the past 8 years.
Feeling a little wierd, I went to the garbage can, pulled out the test that I had taken the day before and low and behold, IT WAS POSITIVE!!!!!!!! Nothing can describe that feeling after waiting all my life to see it!
I had always dreamt of how, when the time came, I would tell Derrick that we were going to have a baby, but never pictured it quite like it happened. I, in my mess of attire, no make-up and un-brushed teeth, picked up the boys, threw them in the car and raced to two different stores before I found another pregnancy test. I had to see another positive! Sure enough, It was for real! The boys and I hurried up to the church, I run in carrying them, one on each hip, and stick my head in the worship room door and ask to speak to Derrick...could not wait!!!! He came out and I handed him the stick! It was amazing!
That was 7 years ago! My Carmen Elizabeth was born on June 22, 2004. I can't believe 7 years have come and gone.
The point I want you to get from this whole story is, God is at work. You may not see it right now. It may not even feel like He knows you exsist, but He does my friend! His plans for you are not to harm you, but to give you hope and a good future! (Jeremiah 29:11) He has blessed my life beyond anything I could have ever dreamed!
Live with expectancy of what God is up to and rejoice to be a part of it!
I love you my sweet Carmen! Happy Birthday!
Let me share with you about a day I will never forget.
It was a Saturday afternoon and I had been cleaning house all day. I don't believe I had even brushed my teeth (Gross, I know!) No make-up, gymshorts and tee shirt...just giving you the full picture. The boys (If this is the first blog of mine that you've read, our first two boys were adopted from birth.) were playing and Derrick was at church leading worship in the two services that our church had every Saturday night. I decided to sit down and write a little in my book. I was on the chapter in my book that discusses different women in the Bible that suffered from infertility and how each of them dealt with it. I began to write a personal point about how through all the devastation, I was now beginning to see the bigger picture. God wanted us to be blessed with two amazingly, precious little boys that I could not imagine my life without. God was revealing to me to live each day in expectancy and excitement to see what He is up to. As I wrote those words down, God told me to go to the bathroom garbage can and look at the pregnancy test that I had taken the day before. Taking a test was a monthly ritual for me. I immediately threw it away because I had heard that the "positive" sign comes up immediately and I didn't see it right away so I chuncked it. Just like the thousands of others that I had taken over the past 8 years.
Feeling a little wierd, I went to the garbage can, pulled out the test that I had taken the day before and low and behold, IT WAS POSITIVE!!!!!!!! Nothing can describe that feeling after waiting all my life to see it!
I had always dreamt of how, when the time came, I would tell Derrick that we were going to have a baby, but never pictured it quite like it happened. I, in my mess of attire, no make-up and un-brushed teeth, picked up the boys, threw them in the car and raced to two different stores before I found another pregnancy test. I had to see another positive! Sure enough, It was for real! The boys and I hurried up to the church, I run in carrying them, one on each hip, and stick my head in the worship room door and ask to speak to Derrick...could not wait!!!! He came out and I handed him the stick! It was amazing!
That was 7 years ago! My Carmen Elizabeth was born on June 22, 2004. I can't believe 7 years have come and gone.
The point I want you to get from this whole story is, God is at work. You may not see it right now. It may not even feel like He knows you exsist, but He does my friend! His plans for you are not to harm you, but to give you hope and a good future! (Jeremiah 29:11) He has blessed my life beyond anything I could have ever dreamed!
Live with expectancy of what God is up to and rejoice to be a part of it!
I love you my sweet Carmen! Happy Birthday!
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