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Why Deny?

2/21/2011

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Many people who are dealing with infertility have been referred to my site in hopes to recieve comfort in some sort of way...if anything just to know that they are not alone.  I haven't written on adoption in a while, but I would love to tonight.
For those who are grieving and have a hole in your heart for the child that you so desperately desire to have, please have an open heart as you read this. 
I can't tell you how it breaks my heart to hear so many of my friends say, "But we just want to have a child of our own." Meanwhile, they continue to throw thousands of dollars away into failed invetros and their arms still remain empty, their hearts still continue to ache an undying pain, their bank account is empty causing a strain on their marriage and they just don't know if they can take it anymore.  It breaks my heart because I KNOW the blessing that they are missing out on!  When you adopt, those children ARE your own!  Having both adopted and biological children now, I can honestly say wtihout one ounce of hesitation that there is absolutely no difference in the love I share between the two!!!  As I struggled for 6 years with infertility I just couldn't understand why God was denying me the privilege to be the mother that I had always dreamed of being.  His plans were not going along with mine and I honestly had many wrestling matches with the Lord in trying to get Him to understand that!  Finally the Lord gently said to me, "Marci, I am not denying you the opportunity to be a mother, you are denying a child the opportunity to have a loving family!"  Wow!  I knew at that moment that God's plans were going to far exceed any of my small minded plans!  My eyes well up with tears as I think about my life without my boys that were given to me through a Faithful Father and through two loving birth mothers. 
Adoption is a risk in the way of never knowing if a birth mother will change her mind.  We have faced that gut wrentching experience, but I promise you that when God places the child in your arms that He intends for you, your life will never be the same and any pain that you have gone through in the past will be gone...just like giving birth!
My heart's desire is to walk beside anyone that is experiencing infertility.  It's indescribable the pain that you feel and unless you've been there, you can't understand it.  I will walk with you , my friend, no matter what your decisions or choices may be.  I just want you to pray about not denying a child who needs love to come be a part of your family!  It's incredible!

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    Marci Shirley

    Christ-Follower, Pastor's Wife, Mother of Six: Eli, Isaiah, Carmen, Jesse, Ciera and Samuel; Author, Speaker, Song Writer

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